I’ve learnt a little these past few months and to be honest some parts of lockdown were really good for me.. I’ve recognised I needed to slow down at times, be okay with having “home” days and make sure that I’m the one in charge of where my feet go..
Over the years I’ve been so driven to help people I’ve often given up control of my own feet. Think about it like this; I’ve been run-around, or had to step-back, been pushed into, swept up by, or found myself in someone’s else’s shoes..
These are all really common sayings for a very common way we work with each other = moving feet.
When was the last time you held your ground, or only stepped in the direction you intended to go?
In some sessions I chat to people about having a “personal space bubble” around them. Think of it as a circle around you: most people think they step forward into something (eg. take action) and step back from (eg. submitting). But we also remind people they also have sideways and diagonals which could represent compromise or new paths they haven’t been on before.
In Horsemanship we talk about being in control of our own feet, and I expect the horse to be in control of his, but also conscious of whether the horse is making us move our feet.. when I start to ask something of my horse (or someone), I prepare. I ground myself, I lift my energy, and begin from a “how little does it take” so as not to demand or over-use the relationship.
Typically it’s not this clear when it comes to the relationships in our lives. But all the more reason to practice good unambiguous relationship practices by being grounded, lifting your energy first, and starting with small steps in your intended direction, and being ok with people who might not want to go there with you, or people who might want to follow you. Leadership of yourself is a healthy thing!