Finding the “Sweet Spot”

I hadn’t realised how much I crave the ‘Sweet Spot’ when it comes to a lot of things in my world. The calm, relaxed, in-touch-with, thoughtful, connected spot, that I strive to be in all of my roles in life. Just writing them down makes that look like a really nice place to be, but I don’t get there half as much as I wish I did, and I do look for ways to do it better every time.

So what is a Sweet Spot?

It’s what I use to describe a moment in time when the horse and I actually just ‘get’ each other, to be completely understood by another in a moment. That’s when it’s really sweet..

For example; If the horse is attuned to me, and my attention moves to an object, like the barrel or cone, then the horse is also drawn to it. Or when the most subtle gesture towards something (like the gate) has my horse prick its ears up in response to my shift.

In horsemanship I get so excited when I find a Sweet Spot with my horse and I am validated when I find a Sweet Spot for a client in session too. Many clients over the years have found their Sweet Spots, whether it be goose-bumpy moments, the realisation that something has just worked out, or they have finally just completely let go of something that had been bothering them for a while. And a Sweet Spot for a client may be a very different place to what a therapist deems as a Sweet Spot.  I would also like to clarify that a Sweet Spot can also be different to a ‘Peak’ moment in session, I believe we can have both, but we could have lots of Sweet Spots, and more likely one ‘Peak’.

With my kids I wish that I’m a Sweet Spot for them, a more connected, in-touch-with Mother to them.  I try to find ways to attune to them better, be more thoughtful and model to them how to be more thoughtful to others. The image I get when I think of this; is when I can kneel down with my arms out wide and have my child come running towards me arms out wide in return to be caught by me and thrown up in the air and hugged and loved on. Ah the Sweet Spot!

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